30 Tips for Thoughtful Gift-Giving
Give a gift that shows you see them
Random Observation/Comment #860: I will give my wife one of the 100 IG reels she shares with me daily. It’s our love language.
//Love these types of gifts. Arts and crafts FTW!
Why this List?
Gift-giving is one of the simplest ways to show care, gratitude, and connection. But let’s face it: choosing the right gift can sometimes feel overwhelming. We’ve all experienced the last-minute scramble, the panic of not knowing what someone might love, or the nagging doubt about whether our gift will hit the mark. When done thoughtfully, giving a gift isn’t just about the object itself—it’s about what it represents. A well-chosen gift says, “I see you. I understand you. I care.”
This list isn’t about flashy, expensive presents or ticking boxes on a holiday to-do list. It’s about elevating gift-giving into a meaningful gesture. It should be something that creates joy for the recipient and, for you, the giver. Whether it’s a small token of appreciation, an experience that creates lasting memories, or a treasure that deepens your bond, a great gift can make someone feel truly valued.
With that being said… I have no idea what I’m going to get my wife. Does thai pants count?
Core Principles of Giving
Gifts show care and understanding: A great gift communicates, "I see you and value what matters to you."
Focus on their interests, not yours: Thoughtful gifts reflect the recipient's passions, hobbies, or needs. It is okay to also share your interest if they’ve shown interest in it. Perhaps a new disc for disc golf for Vinessa?
Pay attention to clues: Casual mentions of what they need or enjoy are golden opportunities. You can always just ask for a generic genre and that might help with narrowing down a few of the choices.
Start with what you know: Think about recent conversations, shared memories, or things they often use.
It’s about love, not cost: The most meaningful gifts aren’t the priciest but the most personal.
Practical Steps
Ask when appropriate: If they’ve shared a wishlist, don’t hesitate to give them exactly what they want.
Keep track of ideas: Use your Keep notes app or contact card to jot down potential gifts throughout the year. I sometimes add this to the calendar where I get notifications for some 30 people’s birthdays.
Plan ahead: Start early to avoid rushed, less thoughtful choices.
Set a budget: Generosity doesn’t mean overspending. A thoughtful gift can be (and usually is) inexpensive.
Match the gift to the relationship: For coworkers, keep it warm and neutral, like a quirky butter dish or consumable.
Adding a Personal Touch
Create a “gift kit”: Build around a theme, such as pairing a butter dish with high-end butter or curating a cozy movie night box.
Personalize it: Monograms, engraved items, or handmade touches make gifts uniquely theirs.
Surprise with treasures: Keep an eye out for small, delightful items that remind you of them. Perhaps we need to do some antiquing.
Revisit shared experiences: Choose gifts tied to an inside joke, memory, or adventure you’ve shared together.
Incorporate discovery: Give something they wouldn’t find themselves but would love, like a quirky antique or unique experience. Can I just get thai pants for everyone?
Creative Gift Ideas
Give experiences, not just things: Museum memberships, event tickets, or planned outings build memories.
Support their hobbies: Choose accessories or tools that enhance their passions, like knitting needle covers or game-night extras.
Think consumables: Gourmet treats, curated wine selections, or fancy chocolates are always appreciated. If they don’t have the space for it, the consumables are useful to have because they’ll eat them all.
DIY gifts: Handmade cookies, artwork, or knitted items carry personal significance.
Offer subscriptions: Book clubs, streaming services, or meal kits make for gifts that have a recurring value.
Deepening Relationships
Spend time with them: Offer gifts that involve shared experiences, like hosting a game night or attending an event together.
Acts of service as gifts: Babysit, help with chores, or plan an event to lighten their load. We just went to this candlelight string quartet in a Church, which was awesome.
Celebrate their wins: Choose gifts that honor milestones or achievements in their life.
Help them feel seen: A thoughtful gift reflects their unique identity, values, or humor.
Frame it with love: A heartfelt note or card can elevate even a simple gift.
Avoiding Pitfalls
Don’t overthink it: Focus on what feels “right enough” rather than striving for perfection.
Avoid assumptions: Skip items that impose your preferences, like overly trendy gadgets or home decor.
Be mindful of their space: If they dislike clutter, consider consumables or digital gifts instead of physical items.
Humor with care: Gag gifts can misfire if they aren’t tailored to the recipient’s sense of humor.
Avoid gifts that feel like chores: Skip items that create work, like plants for a non-gardener or overly complex gadgets.
~See Lemons Give Gifts (but still doing it poorly)